Know that the Lord is God; it is HE who has made us and we are His.

These verses from psalm 100 are comforting words. I fall into thinking at times that the Lord is not good. That He actually is an angry God who, when you strip away all the scriptures and things said about Him over the ages, does not like me. I believe Satan is the author of this thought. It was reinforced by a life of sinfulness before I knew the Lord. Satan tattooed it to my heart/soul/mind? that God was against me. As I have been His follower now for over twenty years, this thought has not been taken away completely. In fact, perhaps because of the reality that I still fall into sin on a daily basis as a Christian, satan turns up the heat,(so to speak), by telling me that if I belong to HIM then I certainly should not be falling into sin so much anymore, therefore God is even more angry with me now than before I really knew Him. My thought life can become extremely twisted and unable to discern truth from a lie. This happens to me often; which is the voice of God and which is just me trying to convince myself of getting my own way in life? While I do believe there is a large amount of cause and effect going on in my life; I sin, I feel bad. I must admit that understanding my God given conscience and the proper level of guilt and remorse escapes me most of the time. There is a place for guilt and shame and remorse in life. There are things that are supposed to cause these feelings in us. My understanding of them is skewed. Is it because of my corruptness before I was a believer? Is it because I still have many corrupt thoughts and actions AS a believer? Is it both? Is it because the "spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places" are doing what they are trained to do in tormenting my soul that God is against me and there is no hope for me? I suspect it is all of these things to a degree. My struggle is with grasping the proper use of my conscience. Paul spoke of his conscience being clear in many places in the scripture. That it is a gift from God. It is also corrupted by our flesh. What is the proper understanding of it? I confess I do not know. I want to follow after my Lord Jesus in all I do. The fact remains that I am not.

Oh Lord, I thank you that You are Good. I am yours. I place myself just as I am into your care. I ask for your wisdom and guidance to rest in your arms. To stay close to you today.

Psalm 100

¹ Shout for joy to the LORD, all the earth.

² Worship the LORD with gladness;
come before him with joyful songs.

³ Know that the LORD is God.
It is he who made us, and we are his ^[a] ;
we are his people, the sheep of his pasture.

⁴ Enter his gates with thanksgiving
and his courts with praise;
give thanks to him and praise his name.

⁵ For the LORD is good and his love endures forever;
his faithfulness continues through all generations.